It has come to the attention of trainpigs.com that people are missing tremendous opportunities on various subway lines due to the inevitable fear of being noticed, and consequently punched in the face by a train pig.
There are certain techniques we here at trainpigs.com employ to avoid this terrible fate:
1. Never obviously take the cell phone photo. In other words, don’t hold the phone up in front of you as if you are snapping a photo of a friend. These people are not your friends. They are barely human. If you are holding a bag, you can stealthily hide half of the device behind the bag and snap the photo easily.
2. Most cell phones make a “click” when snapping a photo. Keep in mind that this is barely audible on the loud subway, and most pigs are wearing headphones/earbuds anyway. If you are nervous, cough while hitting the button to mask the sound. Better yet, spend a minute with your phone to see if it possible to turn this sound OFF.
3. When capturing a train pig is done correctly, it will look like you are simply fiddling with your phone out of boredom.
4. Hold the phone steadily while snapping the photo, and keep it in place for a good couple of seconds. A blurry pig is no good to us. Sideways or upside-down pigs are fine. We can fix those….and sometimes the phone needs to be held in an awkward way to snap the photo without raising eyebrows.
5. Lastly…after the deed has been done, snap the phone closed….or hit a button…..read a text….type a text….whatever necessary to ensure that the image is off your screen ASAP. You’ll have time to admire your handiwork later. If your train is not crowded and nobody can see your screen, go ahead and look at what you have done.
Smile accordingly, and post your shots later.
You’re giving advice on how to take secret pictures of innocent people? WOW. A person who obviously wouldn’t prefer to eat on the train, but does for one reason or another and since the MTA allows it, has to be subjected to deviously created online infamy just cause of your personal opinion?
How is it online infamy when you’ve stated that I’m in the minority? After all, it’s just me and my “low IQ friends” laughing at this website. What do you care? Are you a crusader? Do you wear a cape?
It’s one thing to be starving between appointments and have to scarf down a protein bar on the train (and throw away the wrapper in an appropriate receptacle). It’s another to whip out a pile of wings or peanuts and toss the bones or shells all over the floor because you’re too important or ignorant to care that you’re inflicting your mess on everyone else who rides that train. These assholes create their own infamy; it is not created for them, merely aggregated on this site so that the outraged and disgusted can gather together and mourn the death of civilized society. Dickhead.
Thanks for enjoying the website! Don’t worry, very few people visit these days. Nobody cares.
Be safe, happy holidays, and stand far away from the platform edge.